I feel happy for the first time in weeks. Genuinely happy

Don't know how long this happiness will last, so I thought I'd write this down in case I ever forget I was happy on 25th july 2010.


So I discovered I was upset because I felt useless and that nobody needed me at all, or wanted me by their side. Yeah, like a useless piece of shit nobody wanted to go near. I was convinced people talked to me just because they liked who I was, not who I am.

I get emotionally attached to people really easily and its hard to pull those strings off my chest. More so if I'm forced to do so.

I've also lifted a big rock off my chest by facing up to my fears the past few days. No longer so affected by little things now. Nah I'm just really glad we're talking as per normal again and it feels like its back to day 1 and not the pesky little emotions in between. Perhaps not entirely, but it'll be better.



The sad thing is that we realise our mistakes only after we've gone through entirely tough periods and survived the storm to see the rainbow and in this case, what caused the storm. Made me even more sure about how the only way to learn is through mistakes.

Come tomorrow, I should know what to do too.